Back for another taste

There's an old school 80s/early 90s heavy metal song by a group called Helix called "Back for another taste" that, truth be told, wasn't very popular. But I liked it. And in my semi-drunken state right now, I'm hearing the chorus ring through my head. This was my first night of really going out and partying in Montreal. I attribute this (read: blame this upon) my "little brother" Paul from Sigma Nu. He's only 26 years old, but parties harder than most 19 year olds who're still getting used to being legal age.

I drove up with Paul, Derek and Martin (Derek and Martin being his soccer buddies) and, despite the long-ass drive we endured, we still managed to drink ourselves silly on Québécois beer last night. Well, tonight we wanted to actually hit the town. We spent the afternoon walking around downtown, glancing in the Musique Plus building, walking around the McGill campus and hitting Reuben's deli restaurant for some smoked meat. The next task was to find some decent places to go out and have a good time. As luck would have it, we stumbled (almost literally, in some cases) into a pub crawl called Barhop.

Now on paper, it seems like a pretty good concept. They advertise 25 bars within a short distance, no cover charge and a shuttle bus service for the low price of $20. Here's the thing they don't tell you: (1) Most of these bars don't charge cover in the first place. (2) The shuttle bus is pretty inefficient. (3) A number of the "25 bars" are actually made up of 3-level bars, so rather than 25 locations, you're actually going to 8. (4) Though there isn't a cover in these bars, there IS a mandatory coatcheck. So really, we got hosed all-around.

We hit a few of the bars, but it became apparent that Paul isn't well-suited to the downtown Montreal scene. He seemed to have a knack for pissing off Americans. In fact, in the London Pub, we almost got ourselves in a brawl because some loser was SO insecure that he got worried about Paul talking to the chick he showed up with. Fortunately Paul managed to keep his mouth in check and we wandered down the road to Club Super Sexe. Then Fate struck again... there was a lineup so we ended up talking with some more Americans (naturally) that were waiting in line behind us. Paul's anti-Bush sentiments almost caused us to butt heads with a guy from the US 82nd Airbourne division. I managed to smooth things over by relating the fact that my cousin, Craig, was a rigger who supported the troops down at Fort Bragg in the early to mid 90s.
So after waiting in line at the strip club for an inordinate amount of time, we finally ended up going to my first choice: Belmont Sur le Boulevarde. It's a nice place at the corner of St-Laurent and Mont-Royal, right beside the infamous swinger club, Club Nuances . I think this was our best stop, personally. The music was good. The waitresses were gorgeous and there weren't any mouthy Americans to make our lives miserable. All things considered, I give it a thumbs up. Let's see what New Year's brings!

Super Mom and an Intro to Al's Dating policies

So here we are... my last night in London for a while. The holidays were nice and all, but I think it's about time I get back to the city I now call home: Montreal. I'm supposed to be driving up with my fraternity brother, Paul, and a few of his friends. Mind you, when I asked his brother about it, Eric didn't seem to realise that I was part of the carpool. I find that a bit disturbing since I'm the one who's supposed to be playing host to the gang. I'm sure it'll get sorted out soon enough. In the meantime, I should try and use my last night wisely.

Last night I went down to my usual London watering hole, the Oarhouse, with Morgan. I've been going there for a little over a decade now and, in many ways, I consider it like a home away from home. Once upon a time I was a regular during pretty much every week of football season, but with gradual staff turnover the place lost alot of its appeal. What can I say? I loved Natalie, Estée, Leyan and Robin. Now there's only Megan left from the old crew. Although I must say, they've added some pretty cool replacements, most notably Ashley (AKA Super Mom amongst my friends). It's funny when I think about it, but the ONLY thing I regret about leaving London is the fact that I couldn't take the Oarhouse with me. More accurately, it's that I won't get a chance to get to know Ashley at all.

I don't know much about her, really. I know she's an unmarried mother, going to Huron, and is ridiculously hot-- there's no way anyone would guess she's had a kid. She's also got the sort of personality that just explodes out of her. That sort of charisma is pretty rare. Now here's where I'll make an admission: I would most definitely date her if I had a chance. For those who don't know me and my dating policies, you won't be able to appreciate the significance of the previous sentence. Y'see, I have a virtually ironclad policy of never, EVER being willing to date single moms. Over the years, this has enraged a great number of women out there. So to all those I've offended in the past I say, "Bummer." That's not to say that there haven't been exceptions to the above rule. In fact, I can cite 2 moms (though neither is single) that I would be interested in pursuing. But given the fact that neither is single my rule still stands: no single moms.

You may not agree with my point of view, but I'm entitled to it. And for the sake of internet posterity I'll try to explain my stance one last time:

1) Alan absolutely HATES dealing with exes. Yes, I know that everyone out there will have some sort of ex-boyfriend or ex-husband, etc but when dealing with children, the exes will likely remain a constant part of the equation. The ex will create a certain amount of tension and anxiety, regardless of how amicably they get along. After all, if he was so wonderful, they never would have broken up in the first place. The child is a living, breathing reminder of her time with the ex. A part of her will always be living in the past. I want to build a future with someone, not be continually dealing with the past.

2) Alan wants a family of his own. That goes hand-in-hand with wanting to build a future with someone. I also freely admit that I'm not ready to have a family right now. Some day, sure. But not immediately. I just can't do it.

3) Single moms are less likely to want to have additional kids. I'm sure there are exceptions to this, as well, but it seems to me that if a woman has struggled through raising a child on her own and has finally gotten her life back on track, the last thing she wants or needs is to be derailed by adding more offspring to the mix. So it's less likely that she'll want any more. If my goal is to have a family of my own, as noted in point (2) then it's counter-productive to date someone who doesn't want more kids.

I'm sure I've rationalized it in different ways before, but if you boil it down to its base elements, it comes down to the 3 points listed above. That being said, Ashley makes me rethink my policies. Now I have no idea if she'd even have a coffee with me, let alone go any further, but that's irrelevant now that I live in another city. So methinks it's time to sign off from London. Next stop: Montreal!

the Pool

So I've spent the last several days in varying states of inebriation as I adjust to life in the good ol' "Forest City" of London, Ontario. Not much changes in this town, really. My friends are still as entertaining as always and my parents continue to worry themselves sick about whether I'm ever going to find a path in life. Ah well. I'm in no real hurry yet. That seems to be a commonality amongst my friends. None of us are in any hurry. That led to discussion about the Pool.

So what's the Pool, you ask? Quite simply it's our collective guess as to which of the remaining 4 friends will take the plunge and get married next. There are 4 of our core group of friends who, for one reason or another, are single. And truth be told, no one who participated in the discussion could come up with a compelling argument for any one candidate. It sort of reminded me of the current electoral debates: each of us has some fatal flaw that makes people hesitant to choose us. The discussion really revolved around 3 of the candidates, so I'll set aside my friend John for the moment. That's not to say he isn't a relevant figure in all of this, but really, he's gravitated away from the group over the past decade.

So here are the principle combatants:

OJ


Age: 32
City of Residence: London, Ontario
Occupation: withheld (though one that makes ladies swoon)
Income: pretty darn comfortable
Longest relationship: 4 years, give or take
In brief: OJ's fatal flaw is his desire to be at the center of everything. He's a great guy, and certainly one of the most loyal anyone could hope to find, but he's got a very boistertous personality and that can turn some people off. He has no shortage of confidence, which I've heard is an attractive quality, but his current fixation/dedication to his career can lead to too many semi-interesting stories, wherein he plays the heroic lead. While these can be interesting (and usually quite humourous), he has the tendancy to absolutely dominate conversations, which can be a bit tough for people to handle.

Longterm Prediction: OJ is, at least in my opinion, certainly the frontrunner. He has a good job, has a good heart, is at his physical peak and has the confidence to meet anyone at any time. If he can just tone down the "war stories" then he's got a good shot at finding someone.

Kevin



Age: 31
City of Residence: London, Ontario
Occupation: daytrader in training
Income: variable, as it's commision-based
Longest Relationship: 3-4 years
In Brief: Kev is motivated by style, status and trends. He spends a good deal of time at the gym and at least once per year goes through a rigourous training regimen, reminiscent of the routines some bodybuilders go through to prepare for a competition. As a result, he's very conscious of appearance. Some call it superficial. However he believes that if he's willing to put in the time and effort to look good for his significant other, then she should be willing to put in the same level of dedication to look good for him. Valid point. The main problem with this is that there aren't many people outside of Hollywood or the Fitness Industry that could possibly meet his standards. That being said, he's got plenty of good qualities, as well. He spent alot of time in high school as a peer counsellor and continues to be a good listener and sounding board for whoever needs someone to talk to. He approaches every new opportunity with an open mind and genuine enthusiasm. He's also very easy to talk to and fun to be around.

Longterm prediction: Let's be honest here. He's got the physique, has the style, usually goes to the "in" spots and always has the newest and coolest toys. But if he doesn't loosen up his standards, he'll be the last man standing. I have no doubt he could have found someone long ago, but there really aren't many girls who'll be able to withstand his scrutinty. I think he's in the wrong city. He should be in LA where the bubbleheads run free.

And finally... me!


Age: 31
City of Residence: Montreal, Quebec
Occupation: recently hired Assistant Account Manager for a women's garment company
Income: environ $30,000
Longest Relationship: hmmm... let's go with about 3 weeks.
In Brief: Okay, since I'm writing this about myself, I'll try and be as balanced and unbiased as I possibly can. Yes, I recognize it's impossible to do so considering I'm the subject, but I'm arrogant enough to believe I'm sufficiently self-aware to pull it off. So how do I sum myself up? I'm a series of contradictions. I'm intelligent, but prone to doing stupid things (especially where women are involved). I set goals for myself, then find ways to shoot myself in the foot before reaching them (one of my friends has told me this is "self-handicapping"). I'd like to find someone to settle down with, but also enjoy the flings I've had. I will say, though, that I am intensely loyal to my friends. I'm honest to a fault and am always willing to take responsibility for my successes and failures. I'm also too shy and awkward when meeting people for the first time. So yeah. That's me.

Longterm prediction: To be honest, I'm a bit nervous about this whole thing. I think things will come around once I get my life in Montreal in order. So we'll have to see. I would like to think I'll find someone before I turn 40, but time will tell, right?

Any comments and/or suggestions are welcome!

And so it begins...

So this is it. My first step into a larger cyberworld. While this isn't my first attempt at blogging, my earlier efforts were pretty inconsistent. Just for the sake of continuity, you can find the old entries here. So why have I decided to restart my blogging career here? It all started as a result of a little story that everyone in the blogging universe has come to know (and likely loathe at this point): the Saugeen Stripper. I had received copies of the pictures around the same time as anyone else (environ le 7 décembre), but had no clue it had hit the news media until I saw the story on the Newsvault website. This prompted me to do a wee bit more searching, just to see how far the story had gone. And during the course of this research, I came across the blog of a very intriguing girl: Paige.

I skimmed through a few of her entries and I came to the conclusion that she's pretty cool. Not only that, she's got a knack for writing, as well. In fact, she writes better than I do. And certainly more regularly. So inspiration hit and voilà. Here I am.

I recall a conversation with my fraternity brother, Morgan, back when I was applying to do Masters programs in Journalism a few years ago. As per usual, he was trying to give me a good kick in the tail so I could get things sorted out and decide what direction I wanted to go in with my life. If memory serves (and it usually does), the conversation went like this:

Morgan: Okay, so you want to be a writer?

Al: Yep.

Morgan: Then tell me: when was the last time you wrote anything?

Al: Um, well... I'm not sure.

Morgan: Uh-huh. Look sport, you can't be a writer if you don't write anything. So if you want to do it, then write something!

So that's what I'm doing right now. I figured now was as good a time as any to get back to it. After all, if I want to ever do a Masters, I have to get used to writing again. I wonder how long I'll keep this little blog going? Time will tell, I guess.