Cagibi ***updated Feb 5/06***

For me, September 20, 2005 will always hold a special place in my heart. It was the first night that I went out on the town with my new roommates, Meagan and Kate. We had been living together for about 2 weeks, but for one reason or another, we'd never managed to go out and be social together. Truth be told, we still don't manage to make it out together that often, but that's neither here nor there. That night, a group from Trois-Pistoles was playing at Le Medley on rue St-Denis for the UQAM start of the session party. They were the opening act of a pretty decent showcase, featuring some up-and-coming Francophone bands, like Les Breastfeeders and Malajube. But for me, that was secondary. I was there to see Cagibi.

I remember the first time I heard about Cagibi. I was sitting in the lobby of l'école secondaire l'Arc-en-ciel, just killing some time. Fred had given us a free afternoon from l'atelier and rather than sit around le presbytère, I had decided to pop into the school to work on mon exposé oral. As I'm sitting there I see mon animateur, Fred, walking in with his guitar slung over his shoulder. He was on his way to jam with the Music atelier. We talked a bit and then he showed me the indy CD that he and his his friends had produced.

"Cool," I thought. "I'll have to check them out."

I finally got my chance to see them live in November of 2004 during Coup de Coeur Francophone in Montreal. I was closing in on my 30th birthday, so I wanted to party it up in the best city in Canada! So I dragged my buddy, Dré, out to Bar l'Escogriffe on Rue St-Denis to see what the lads from le Bas St-Laurent could do. Turns out the boys can play.

Their music is a funk-rock fusion with an environmental theme. Definitely not the sort of music one would expect to come out of a town where Slayer t-shirts seem to be the unofficial school uniform, but it works for them. And though the enviro message is pretty blatant, it still comes across as genuine. Here's a lyrical sample of Recyblage off their indy release 100% biogroovable:

Reconditionnez vos têtes (Recondition your heads)
Réorganisez vos pensées (Reorganize your thoughts)
Votre façon de travailler (Your way of working)
Vos relations à tous côtés (Your relations on all sides)
Reconditionnez vos têtes (Recondition your heads)
Votre nouvelle façon d'être… (Your new way of being)

Admittedly, my translation needs a bit of work, but you get the idea. I contacted Sebastien Rioux, the lead vocalist of the group, with a few questions, and he was good enough to send me some responses. In this interests of integrity, I'm going to post the responses, as is, in French and then translate into English. My version will appear in italics. So without further ado, the questions:

Salut Alan, voici les réponses à tes questions. J'espère que ca fera ton affaire...
Seb

Q-(1) Pourquoi avez-vous choisi le nom «Cagibi» pour le groupe? En anglais, c'est "storage room"... est-ce qu'il y a une signification de ce nom?

R-C’est l’endroit où l’on pratiquait, le cagibi. Dans la chambre de notre premier batteur. Le cagibi c’est l’endroit où l’on range les choses, pour les prendre lorsque nécessaire. Le cagibi, c’est la représentation de la société actuelle.

R- It's the place where we were practising, the storeroom, in the room of our first drummer. The storeroom is the place where we would keep things, to take when necessary. The storeroom is a representation of actual society.

Q-(2) C'est évident qu'il y a une influence environnementale présente dans vos chansons. Est-ce que c'est quelque chose qui va continuer pendant l'évolution du groupe? Qu'est-ce que vous voulez dire dans vos chansons?

R-J’écris les textes parce que je les vie. Je n’arrêterai jamais de me battre pour le sort de la planète. Le prochain album se proclamera plus engagé socialement, sans pour autant délaisser le côté environnemental. Le fait d’aborder le sujet humain dans mes présents et futurs textes n’est qu’une suite logique. L’humain et son environnement sont deux sujets indissociables. Les textes du prochain album auront donc cet optique.

R-I write the texts because I live them. I will never stop fighting for the fate of the planet. The next album will be more socially engaged, without putting aside the environmental side. Tackling the human subject in my present and future texts is only a logical progression. Man and his environment are 2 inseparable subjects. The songs on the next album will have this viewpoint.

Q-(3) Cagibi s'est formé il y a 6 ans (environ). Est-ce qu'il y avait une vision du groupe au début? Avec toute les changements, comment est-ce que cette vision a changé?

R-Cagibi aura 7 ans en juin prochain. Et l’évolution de Cagibi est notoire. Le son s’est développé, les mots se sont radicalisés. Nous avons tous vieilli et ça se sent dans notre musique. Certains musiciens ont changé également. Nous avons un tout nouveau batteur et bassiste. Nous avons également ajouté une trompette et un saxophone. Notre son est plus funk, tout en gardant nos racines rock. Un mélange qui s’est défini au fil des ans. La production de notre premier album a été un moment crucial pour la formation. Et nous avons tout donné et le résultat en dit long ! Nous sommes bien fier de ce premier album, dont même un vidéoclip a été produit. Mais le temps est venu pour nous de continuer, d’avancer, et de faire progresser le processus de création. Surtout avec les nouveaux musiciens, le mélange donne quelque chose d’explosif.

R-Cagibi will be 7 years old next June. And the evolution of the group is well-known. The sound developed itself, the words radicalised. We've all matured and that is felt in our music. Some musicians changed, as well. We have a brand new bassist and drummer. We've also added a trumpet and saxophone. Our sound is more funk, while preserving our rock roots. A mix that definied itself over the course of the years. The making of the first album was a crucial moment for the group. We gave it everything and and the results spreak for themselves. We're very proud of our first album, from which a video was produced. But the time came for us to continue, to advance and to move ahead in the creative process. Especially with the new musicians, the mix brings something explosive.

Q-(4) Vous êtes plein d'énergie sur scène et vous montez un bon spectacle, mais pour vous, quel est plus importante? La musique où le message?

R-Même la musique instrumentale a un message. Il faut savoir écouter. Avec les mots en plus le message devient encore plus présent. Mais l’un inspire l’autre. Quand j’écris les mots, j’entends la mélodie, j’entends le rythme. La musique représente le message véhiculé par la musique. On s’assoit ensemble et on discute. On analyse,et met nos idées en musique. L’énergie du spectacle vient du plaisir qu’on a à être sur scène. On le transmet au public et il nous le redonne. Ça explose !

R-Even the music has a message. You just have to know to listen. With the words the message becomes more and more present. But one inspires the other. When I write the words, I hear the melody, I hear the rhythm. The message is carried by the music. We sit them together and we discuss. We analyse and put our ideas to music. The energy of the show comes from the pleasure of being on stage. We transmit it to the public and they give it back. It rocks!

Q-(5) Comme vous savez, je suis anglophone et complètement nouveau au Québec. Je veux comprendre plus de la culture québécoise. Comment est-ce que vous décrivez la nature de votre culture... dans un sens, l'esprit du Québec?

R-Hey tabar%$@... Alan ! C’est pas une question ça….je pourrais te répondre avec un livre ! Pour comprendre qui on est, il faut comprendre d’où l’on vient. Notre histoire est rempli d’histoires épicées, d’embûches « constructives », de contrôle par une autorité… non valide à nos yeux. C’est cela qui faut comprendre pour comprendre la culture et l’âme québécoise. Tu as déjà fait un grand pas pour nous comprendre en aménageant dans notre belle province…

R- Geez, Alan! That's not a question... I could write you a book! To understand who we are, il's necessary to understand where we come from. Our history is full of spicy stories, of "constructive" problems, of control by an authority... not validated, in our eyes. It's that which you have to understand in order to understand the Quebec culture and soul. You've already taken a big step toward understanding us in moving to our beautiful province.

Q-(6) Avez-vous des suggestions (comme des endroits, des choses à faire, etc) pour m'aider pendant mon «voyage de découverte» au Québec?

R-Laisses aller ton fou, fais toi des amis québécois, une blonde québécoise, une vraie immersion enivrante. Le Québec est unique et on ne le comprend quand le vivant à fond. Va voir les concerts de la scène local, lit des livres d’auteurs québécois, découvre le théâtre québécois et le cinéma de notre province. La culture d’une société, c’est son âme.

R-Go crazy, make Quebecois friends, find a Quebecois girlfriend, a really intoxicating immersion. Quebec is unique and we understand it when we live it thoroughly. Go see the local concerts, read books by Quebecois authors, discover Quebecois theatre and the films of our province. The culture of a society is its soul.

***

I'd just like to take a moment to thank Sebastien for taking the time to answer my questions, as well as thank Phil for helping me out with some of the trickier translations. I recommend checking these guys out, if you happen to be in la belle province. They're worth the roadtrip up here.

Starting points: the Quest begins

Anyone who's spent any time with me over the past few years knows that I've been absolutely obsessed with learning French. Though it never replaced my obsession with the team in Honolulu Blue, Silver and Black during football season, it ran a close second. I took evening French classes, rented French language dvds... I even bought an interactive CD-ROM. All this to try and get better at the language. I think I've done pretty well, so far. There's more to be done, of course, but I've got time.

Along the way, I realised that learning a language is about more than conjugating verbs or making sure that adjectives agree in gender and number to the noun they're modifying. Language becomes a part of the people who use it, so for me to deepen my understanding of French, I needed to go where it's actually spoken on a daily basis. In Canada, that's Québec. So what do we know about la belle province? I decided to take a quick gander at the Statistics Canada website to dig up some preliminary information.

As of October 1, 2005, Québec had an estimated population of 7,616,645 people. Unfortunately, I don't have current data pertaining to the languages spoken in Québec, so I'll lean on the 2001 figures. At that point, approximately 54% of the province only spoke French and 41% of the people could speak both official languages. I have no idea whether this has changed over the past 5 years or not, but either way, it's still a substantial number of French-speaking people. So what are they like? Are they THAT different from English-speaking Canadians? That's what I'm trying to find out.

As luck would have it, there was a special edition of L'actualité that came out in November of 2005 with the title, 101 mots pour comprendre le Québec. That's what I call timing! Naturally, I picked it up to see how they described themselves. The issue contained a series of commentaries from artisits, politicians, authors, pretty much whoever they wanted, discussing a particular word alloted to them by the issue's editors. One section that I found particularly interesting was the piece called "Les Québécois en 10 adjectifs." And though I know its inclusion in the edition was done mainly for the purposes of humour, I think they were pretty much bang-on in their descriptions.

Here's the list they came up with. I'll be adding my own comments or summarizing theirs, depending on how the mood strikes me. Don't worry, I'll translate for you:

(1) Fier: very simply, proud. Sounds about right to me. They're proud of their heritage, their culture and their contributions to the world (though they tend to ignore their contributions to Canada).
(2) Hédoniste: they're all about pleasure. This comes through in the "joie de vivre" that we anglos tend to notice. It's a party culture, in many ways. That certainly explains the "climat de permissivité sexuelle et de sensualité" that one finds everywhere in Montréal.
(3) Bouillant: I think this roughly translates to "hot-tempered" or "passionate." I noticed this with a former coworker from the call center. This girl would argue her point until you thought she'd explode--even when she was proven wrong. But it's that fire that set her apart from the other employees. And it's that fire that seems to live in the hearts of any Québécois I've ever met.
(4) Individualiste: This one is pretty straight forward, as well. Do your own thing and be your own person and you'll get along fine with the Québécois. Just don't try and tell them how to live their lives. You'll run headlong into point (3) if you do.
(5) Insouciant: carefree.
(6) Tolérant: In terms of their attitudes towards sex, drugs, prostitution, definitions of the term "family", sure, they're very tolerant. They're free-spirits. But of all the adjectives the article came up with, this is the one I disagree with the most. They're not very tolerant in terms of their language. I've had a rough time finding work so far, mainly because of the lack of tolerance. But then, that's just my opinion.
(7) Grégaire: gregarious or social. They're a lively bunch and they love to socialize. This goes back to the "joie de vivre" mentioned earlier.
(8) Enraciné: They're entrenched in their culture. They're proud of who they are and want to protect who it.
(9) Prudent: They're not big on taking risks. That being said, I wonder why we have such a high number of aerial freestyle skiiers of Québécois origin... ?
(10) Macho: This sentiment goes back as far as the colonies. The Coureur des Bois and the Voyageurs who followed in their footsteps were manly men of the wilderness. Women were supposed to stay home and mind the household. Though I imagine this is in the process of changing (after all, Québec has one of the strongest Women's Rights movements around), it's only been a couple of generations since women started taking their place beside men in the workplace. This machismo will be a part of la memoire collective for quite some time.

So that's my starting point. I guess I'll see in the weeks and months to come how accurate this portrayal really is. I'm looking forward to seeing how it all turns out.

The Quest for Credibility

I've been thinking again (wacky idea, I know, but I like to live dangerously) and I've come to the conclusion that I want to this blog to be about more than just my late-night ramblings. After all, there are only so many half-baked tirades I could possibly put together before I run out of steam. And though the point of this little experiment was to practise (and improve) my writing, I still want there to be some relevant content. I can certainly appreciate the therapeutic aspect of these little online diaries, and they're definitely useful for keeping up with friends who've moved away, but I want to try and do more.

So the question is: what do I want to do? And once I've figured that out: how do I manage to do it? I want to try and preserve the personal touch, as best I can, while coming up with content that may be of interest to people beyond my inner-circle of friends. Gee, that wasn't too ambiguous, was it? Let's try and define it a bit more then. I'm going to explore the things that interest me in Montreal and document it as best I can. This will include things like music, québécois culture, sports, maybe a bit of history... as an anglophone living in a francophone province, I think that a journey of discovery through this province could make for some good copy.

I will also take requests. If there happens to be something that my loyal readership wants me to investigate, please feel free to leave notes in the comment section. On that note, I'll be off...

O Brother, Where Art Thou?

To believe in the Life of Love,
To walk in the Way of Honour,
To serve in the Light of Truth-
This is the Life, the Way and the Light of Sigma Nu-
This is the Creed of our Fraternity.

Yes, it's true. I am an alumnus member of the Kappa Beta chapter of Sigma Nu Fraternity at the University of Western Ontario. I enjoyed my time in the undergraduate "Active" chapter, made a number of lifelong friends and have met people that I never would have under normal circumstances. I'm proud of the founding values and, though I'm not perfect, I try to live each day of my life by the guiding principles of Love, Honour and Truth. But like it or not, my Fraternity is suffering from the same sort of anti-Fraternity sentiment that has caused a decline in membership across almost all the Greek-Letter Societies on campus.

So why do Fraternities and Sororities get such a bad rep at UWO? Is there any truth behind the clichés and stereotypes? What has caused this backlash against these student-run organizations? Let's try and take these on one at a time, shall we? Maybe once we hash this out a bit, things will get a whole lot clearer.

Why do Fraternities and Sororities get such a bad rep at UWO? Because in many cases, they deserve it. People do a lot of stupid things during their university career and members of Fraternities and Sororities are no different. It seems to me that the larger the group, the more likely they are to try and do something akin to the pranks and antics one sees in Animal House. They want their own little slice of immortality in the annals of campus lore. The unfortunate thing is that entire organizations and, in fact, the whole Greek Letter system, can be coloured by the actions of a very small sampling of their membership. In all reality, a frat keg party isn't going to be any wilder or more exciting than one held on Broughdale by OC sophs. But the perception is different. Expectations are higher, so frat members (or possibly even partygoers) may do things they otherwise wouldn't in order to spice things up. There's more anonymity and less accountability under the Fraternity banner. Just remember that everyone is prone to doing stupid things from time to time.

Is there any truth behind the clichés and stereotypes? Absolutely. But again, I believe this has more to do with people wanting to play the role of the typical frat boy or sorority girl. My brothers in the Active chapter were pretty down to earth guys, overall. And certainly not the kind you'd immediately think of as "frat boys." That being said, you're going to find a wide range of people in most Fraternities. There'll be the occasional rich kid who has too much access to daddy's visa. You're going to find the playa out there to nail any woman that breathes. But I bet you could find these same archtypes in just about any club on campus. You'll also find these same kinds of guys at Queen's and they've never allowed Fraternities on campus!

What has caused this backlash against these student-run organizations? It all comes down to conditioning. From the moment a first year student comes on campus, the only information they receive is negative. Last time I checked, Orientation Staff were not permitted to wear their letters on campus (if they were members of a Fraternity or Sorority) during O-Week, nor were they allowed to directly promote or solicit membership or interest. There may also be a well-placed opinion piece or two in the Gazette bashing the Fraternity concept over the course of the year. I would be hardpressed to believe the Gazette editors, though they change every year, will have given up what had become a time-honoured tradition of frat-bashing. As a longtime contributer to the paper during the latter part of my undergraduate days, I know whereof I speak. So unless they go out of their way to seek out the info, students will likely just believe what they've been told, without getting the other side.

There is also no support from the University Students' Council. In days past, the Greek-Letter Societies have attempted to gain status as student organizations, but have been denied. They'll no doubt cite the "exclusivity" of Fraternities as a major reason for this, as well as their affiliation with International organizations. But has one ever stopped to consider that Fraternities are a lot more open and welcoming than they appear at first glance? When I was in the Active Chapter, we had a pretty diverse group, ethnically and religiously speaking speaking. We had Filipinos, Indians, Chinese, and Caucasians who were Christians, Jews, Atheists, or Sikhs. We were more concerned with the kind of person we invited to be a member moreso than skintone or religion.

Let's take a look at the USC now: Although technically anyone can join a USC recognized club, how many Jamaican students do you find in the Chinese Students' Association? Or Muslims joining the Campus Crusade for Christ? Think about that for a moment or two. The biggest difference is that Fraternities ask specific people to join, usually after holding several events to get to know the prospective members. Is the invitation process really the source of all the uproar?

I'm not saying the USC has to fund the Fraternities, not by a longshot. But by the same token, I don't believe it's just to charge them business rates for the use of the UCC Atrium. These are still students trying to promote their student-run organizations. They're also not-for-profit organizations, so give them a break! Give them the same chance to promote themselves as is afforded the Purple Spur Society.

So while we're discussing things anyway, let's take a look at the biggest accusation thrown at fraternities: why do you have to buy your friends? We're not buying our friends. We're paying membership fees, much as any other student does for their club membership. However, in most cases, we're also contributing our share towards the running of the year's social events upfront. Let's take another look at our friends in the Spur. The standard membership fee when I was a member was $20. The pub events were usually $5 at the door, give or take, plus drinking money. There were typically 2-3 pub events in the first term, and then Winter Week (capped off by the infamous ski trip) and the semi-formal. So if one were to attend all the club's activities, without drinking a single beer at the bar, then your total cost for the year would run somewhere in the neighbourhood of $340 or so. That's starting to look alot like lower level Fraternity dues to me. Add in the alcohol for the home football games, the pubs and your ski trip stock, and semi-formal and you're all of a sudden into the $500 range, easily. And once your year is up, it's up. Hmmm... and this club is funded by the USC... At least Fraternity membership extends beyond the undergraduate years. In fact, one of the most reliable of my friends in Montreal is my fraternity brother, Phil. We've hung out more often here than we ever did when I was in London.

So if there's all this negativity focused toward Fraternity life, then what are the benefits? Well, everyone gets something different out of it. For me, I liked the idea that I could be part of something that had a history at Western. I also liked the idea that even though I may leave the city, move on to different things, etc that there would always be something to come back to that felt like home. I wrote for the Gazette for 2 years, but do you think anyone would know me if I walked through the office doors today? Not a chance. But when I walk back into the Fraternity house, I'm welcomed back immediately, whether the brother has ever met me before or not. We've also got a very well developed development program called LEAD (Leadership Ethics Achievement and Development) used during the pledge process. I found that info to be quite helpful once I entered the corporate world. I've also met a variety of alumni who have been helpful as I've tried to make my way in the "real" world, post-university.

Now if you've managed to make it to this part of the posting, then congratulations! Don't worry, I'm wrapping it up now. My whole point in writing this commentary is to provoke some thought. Whether or not you choose to investigate the Fraternity scene is a personal choice. I'm happy I made my choice. The important thing about university is to get involved in something, whether it be the campus Foot Patrol or the Chess Club, just do something. University is about more than just the classes you take and the degree you earn. It's about experiences, memories, and relationships.

DEFCON 2

DEFCON 5 Normal peacetime readiness
DEFCON 4 Normal, increased intelligence and strengthened security measures
DEFCON 3 Increase in force readiness above normal readiness
DEFCON 2 Further increase in force readiness, but less than maximum readiness
DEFCON 1 Maximum force readiness

I'm officially now at DEFCON 2. I had a chat with my boss today and I found out that my Judgement Day is set for Thursday. That's the day they decide if they want to keep me or trade me in for a sleeker model. Now I won't point any fingers, but I also won't accept all the blame for the way things have unfolded in the workplace. The bottomline is that I've got to find another job. Quickly.

For those of you joining the party in progress, I'll give you a quick recap. Sometime after I came back from my immersion session in Trois-Pistoles in the summer of 2004, I decided that I wanted to live in Quebec. So I started saving my nickels and plotting my escape from the tedium that is London, Ontario. I left my job in April and took back to back immersion sessions in preparation for my grand adventure in Montreal. By September, I had packed my bags, moved in with 2 hot girls and was well on my way to maxing my line of credit.

Just when I thought I was going to have to go scurrying back home to Ontario, tail between my legs, I landed my first job in Montreal. So I did what any irresponsible guy would do: I partied. HARD. After all, I had an income now. Things were looking up! It was time to really start living again! I'm in Montreal, damn it! Let's get the party started! Bad call. In retrospect, I should have held off booking the tickertape parade. And try as I might, I just can't get back the deposit on the one-man band. Note to self: get past the probation period at work before you spend money you don't have.

So what's next for ol' Al? Fortunately for me, I still had some CVs floating around out there and I managed to get a few calls for interviews. Self-preservation has taken over and I've scheduled appointments for Thursday night and Friday morning. Presuming there's some sort of "master plan" out there (and also presuming that plan doesn't include me living in a cardboard box or making a jump into exotic dancing), then one of these leads will pan out. If not, we move to DEFCON 1...

The war at home

I may as well get comfy, because I think I'm going to be in the dog house for quite a while. Things didn't get smoothed over with Meagan. In fact, she's angrier than ever. She spent all of yesterday either avoiding me outright (including lack of eye contact and not saying a word) or slamming things shut. One thing I can say for her: she's not subtle. She didn't say a word to me until she was ready to leave for Vanessa's little "going away" party. Considering she had completely left me out of the loop in the hours leading up to it, it was pretty obvious to me that Meagan really didn't want me around.

So was I out of line on Friday with what I said? Yes, I was. And when she did finally give me the option of coming to the party, I apologized for hurting her feelings. But evidently I missed the point of why she was angry. And if I were in her position, I imagine I would feel the same way. It is hypocritical of me to get angry about one of her friends talking shit, but then turn around and up the ante by saying some extremely harsh things about him. Now would I ever really cause this guy physical harm? Or was this drunken posturing? I would say drunken posturing. I'm not a violent person, by nature, and I really don't like conflict.

Kate does believe that I was out of line and that there's a difference between apologizing for hurting someone's feelings versus apologizing because I understand why she's upset. I'm not sure whether I should give her some more space to cool down or if I should just head into the lionesse's den and deal with things. In any case, I've got a few hours to consider my options since she's gone to the library.

I managed to dig myself further into a hole by not going to Vanessa's last night. I knew at the time that I should probably go, out of courtesy, but I didn't. So Vanessa appeared on our doorstep this morning to come and say good bye. I guess she did consider me a friend after all. She and I really hadn't been too close for months (those who know me personally know the sordid story), but I mattered enough that she wanted to see me one more time before she left. That's sweet of her.

Now once she left, I found out that Meg was now that much MORE angry at me than she was before. Though I had no way of knowing it, Vanessa cried last night when Meg told her I wasn't coming. Yep, so I messed up on that one. No doubt about it. I feel bad about it. Guess we'll see how long it takes before something resembling normalcy around here.

If it weren't for Bad Luck...

Last night's "bad luck" party at Alexa's was an eye-opener. I don't think I've ever seen so many people crammed into an apartment like that before. And they seemed to be a pretty diverse crowd, too! It's all the more remarkable when you consider the fact that only 3 of the 4 roommates there invited people. Glancing back at the e-mailed invitation, there's no way I would have predicted that so many people would show. I figured it would be a pretty casual night, something akin to the dinner parties we hold here from time to time. Note to self: hot newfie girls know how to throw a good party. The thing is, it was damn near impossible to talk to anyone once it got into full swing.

The action was divided into 3 main areas of the apartment: the living room, the kitchen and Alexa's room. While the first 2 locales are pretty standard for any gathering, it was the third that really caught my attention. Y'see that's where they were smoking the sheesha. I can honestly say that I had never seen one of those before moving to Montreal and, truth be told, had never seen one in action before last night. Some sort of molasses and fruit tobacco mixture is put in a ceramic bowl, topped with foil. Then hot coals are placed on top to burn the tobacco. I really don't know too much about how the contraption works, but I imagine it's similar to a bong. There's apparently a pretty lengthy cultural history in India and the muslim world regarding smoking sheesha. Just goes to show how oblivious I am of other cultures.

Kate was in pretty fine form, I must say. I really wish I had her confidence. She's already pretty outgoing, but once you add alcohol to my sweet little roomie, she seems to lose all fear. In fact, when I left I think she was still deciding if there was anyone worth picking up. Since no unknown male appeared from her room this morning, there must not have been any decent prospects there. It blows me away that she's still single. But like I said in the past, it's better to find the right one, rather than bedhop.

I didn't stay particularly late, myself. Once I had finished my Labatt Bleue Dry, I wandered back home. I got into a semi-drunken conversation with my other roommate, Meagan, on my cell. Probably not the best chat. I had just enough alcohol in my system to pretty much speak my mind about anything, particularly if it was something that gets under my skin. Wouldn't you know it, but the name of one of her friends came up. I told her that I didn't like him, his personality, or the fact that he disrespected my friends in my presence. I also told her that if he did it again, he wouldn't like the consequences. To be honest, it wasn't phrased nearly as politely. I was downright nasty with what I had to say. So I should probably go smooth things over with her now. She's already got CMT, so I know she's up... alright, that's it for now.

The continuing story of a quack who's gone to the dogs...

So here we are on a Friday night and I'm making a new entry for all of my devoted fans. I know that 4 days sans nouvelles de moi must have sent you into major withdrawl, but here I am. I managed to survive my first week at work. I have to admit, it was a close one... I'm pretty sure there was about a 40% chance I would get fired today. But fear not, I live to fight another day. Hopefully things start to get easier with each passing week. I can't afford to be out of work again. I'm already cutting it pretty close as it is. But enough about that.

Today is Friday the 13th and a friend of Kate's is having a "Bad luck" party to celebrate. Sounds like it could be alot of fun. And since it's being thrown by a newfie, the bevies will be flowing well into the mornin'. That should be good for a laugh or two...

This is also the last weekend that Vanessa, the French exchange student, will be in town. She's finished her internship for the semester, so she'll be heading back to France on Tuesday. Definitely an interesting character, that's for sure. I don't think I've met anyone as obsessed with food (everything from the preparation of it to the consumption of it) as she is. A couple of months ago she dropped by and literally talked for 2 straight hours about food. I think it's a cultural thing. I don't know too much about France, in general, so I guess I really shouldn't comment, but whatever. In any case, it looks like whoever is around will be hitting the bars tomorrow night to celebrate her departure.

Katie just called, so I've got to get going. Off to the badluck party!

How 'bout them apples?

So it seems I've had a new visitor to my blog today... a few new ones, in fact. To those of you visiting for the first time, welcome! Feel free to come back and see what nonsense I've decided to spew this time. I appreciate each and every one of you, however I must admit that the highlight of my young blogging career was when I noticed that someone on the House of Commons service provider popped on to check out my little commentary about Separatism in Quebec! Nice to see the folks on the Hill decide to take notice of the little guys...

Today was also interesting in that I started my first job in Montreal. Truth be told, I still don't really know what I'll be doing in the weeks and months to come, but at the very least I've got something that resembles an income again. Now I can start paying off my debts again. Who'd have thought it would take THIS long to get going in the right direction? Certainly not me. I had gotten to the point where I had to take back 12 cases of empties to be able to afford Metro tickets! That was cutting it a bit too close for my comfort. Maybe now I can start enjoying this city a bit more.

I'm really feeling tuckered out at the moment, so I'll have to keep this one short today. But rest assured, I'll be back soon to entertain, offend, inform and just generally make an ass of myself!

The Separatist Question

Since I'm now living in la Belle Province, I figured I should continue my trend of inflammatory comments by addressing the Separatist movement in Quebec. To be honest, I hadn't really paid any attention to it or its proponents before the summer of 2004 when I first went off to the French Immersion program at L'école de langue française de Trois-Pistoles. For those unfamiliar with le petit village, Trois-Pistoles is located between the "thriving metropolises" of Rivière du Loup and Rimouski. It's been running a language exchange school for the past 74 years wherein students from across Canada are welcomed by local families for a 5 week period of class instruction, cultural activities and general merriment. The program is affiliated with the University of Western Ontario, and runs 2 sessions : spring and summer.

Part of what makes the exchange so interesting is that, whether the students realise it or not (and most don't until about Week 3), the staff, les animateurs et même les familles d'accueil sont des séparatistes. For me, this was a major, major blow. It felt almost like a violation of trust. These people had welcomed me into their home, were eager to teach me their language (la langue de mes ancêtres), yet, all things being equal, would rather not be a part of our country! This led me into many debates avec mon animateur, Fred, none of which actually solved anything. He still believes very strongly that the only way for Québec to survive is to control its own destiny as a sovereign country. I disagree.

So let's take a look at some of the highlights of my discussions with Fred. According to Fred, Quebec is already a nation in the sense of a group of people who share the same language and belief structure. Absolutely true. Heck, if those pinhead commentators on TSN can refer to the Leafs Nation all the time, then let's call the Quebecois exactly what they are: a nation. He wants to protect his language and culture and believes that Quebec is fully capable of being its own country. Perhaps it is. But here's where it gets a bit sticky for me: what are they trying to protect? What are they so afraid of?

In a word: me. Well, not necessarily me, per se, but rather what my family represents. Y'see, contrary to popular belief here in Quebec, my family traces its origins back to the original colonies. My branch of the family relocated to Ontario and subsequently lost its French roots about 80-100 years ago. I'm a walking example of what could happen to them if they don't take a more firm control over their own business. Pretty scary stuff if you think about it. A significant part of my heritage was wiped away because we weren't strong enough to guard it. This is what they fear.

They recognize that they're a mere 6 million or so within the borders of Quebec, surrounded in a sea of 300 million anglophones. All their history and their culture is threatened by this. The only alternative they see now is a true country of their very own. They don't feel welcome in the rest of Canada. They recognize that bilingualism is a joke outside of politics. They feel like second-class citizens in a country they've helped build. All these are valid points. I empathize. I've had a difficult time, myself, trying to reclaim my ability to speak French. Perhaps if I live here long enough I'll get it down. But I still don't think that leaving Canada is the right answer.

I told Fred, during one of our last discussions, that he needed to define what he was trying to protect. Is it the rural culture of villages like Trois-Pistoles? Or is it the metropolitan cultures of Montreal, Quebec City or Trois-Rivières? Because if the separatists want to protect the culture of the villages, then sadly, the battle has already been lost. The youth of Quebec are infatuated with American music, movies, styles... much as the rest of the world seems to be. They see no opportunity to live out their dreams in small towns like Trois-Pistoles. In their eyes, the only way to make a life for themselves is to move to the big cities. Fred, himself, lives in Montreal. To my surprise, he conceded that point.

So I asked the question again: are you trying to protect the culture of Montreal, Quebec City and Trois-Rivières? Because let's face facts here-- it's not in ANY danger of going anywhere. These cities are unlike any others in Canada. And it comes from the collective spirit of the people here. There are so many things that English Canadians miss out on because they haven't taken the time to explore the language, the history or the culture here. But rest assured, the culture is alive and well. One need just walk down Rue St-Denis to see what I'm talking about.

So if we've eliminated the whole "cultural protection" argument, then what's left? The language issue. Part of what defines a culture is its language-- the way the people express themselves. Fred noted that it's pretty much mandatory for Quebecois to learn to speak English if they want to have any sort of future. This leads to an anglicizing of the language and gradual assimilation into the anglophone world. Interesting perspective.

I believe this gradual assimilation has more to do with the Americans than anything else. They're such an overpowering economic force that you either learn to play by their rules or suffer the consequences. Most of Quebec's trade is with the US. Heck, a good chunk of their tourism industry is supported by vacationing Americans. So that being the case, English will still be a vital part of the education of any Quebecois, whether they remain a part of Canada or not. So why leave?

Fred also points to the declining number of francophones in the population. In my opinion, this has more to do with Quebecois women being fed up with the thankless job of being baby factories. Hundreds of years of producing 15 offspring is bound to be wear on them. The women want more from their lives, so we see the pendulum swing the other way. Now you'll be lucky to find a québécoise who wants more than even one child. The end result is the significant decline of this ethnic group within the next couple of generations. After all, if they don't have at least 2, then they don't even maintain the current population, let alone increase it. All immigration will do is further decrease the percentage of remaining Quebecois in the province, despite safeguarding the language. So they still lose. The francophone entity of Quebec may remain, but the Quebecois culture disappears. Immigrants won't necessarily feel any sort of affinity to the old traditional songs or the history. So again, I ask: Why leave?

I really don't have the answers any more than the next person. But I know it'll take a significant effort on the part of both English and French Canada to make anything work. If we truly want to build a Canada we can be proud of, then anglophones are going to have to open their collective minds to Quebec. I'm not saying that we should hand over any veto powers or give special privileges to francophones, but I do believe we should continue to educate our children in both languages and encourage exchanges and immersion programs like the one in Trois-Pistoles. Understanding can only be reached through dialogue, education and experience. So let's give it a shot. The only thing we really have to lose is... well... our country.

Getting Topical

I received a politically oriented forward in my Inbox today. I guess the election campaign really is in full-swing. It was in the form of a chain letter meant to promote Stephen Harper as the next best option to be Prime Minister of Canada. I'm not sure who actually wrote the original letter, and that's really not terribly important. What is important, however, is that it's yet another level of Conservative smear campaigning, meant to influence the under-educated into swinging their votes to the Big Blue Machine.

So for giggles, let's take a look at some of this guy's principle points. My responses will be in Italics.

Since 1993:

(1) My taxes have increased.

Okay genius, that's 12 years. It's called inflation. There isn't a damn thing that HAS remained the same in the past 12 years. The cost of maintaining and/or improving services is going to go up. Hell, look at how much university tuition has gone up in the province of Ontario since 1993. When I started at Western, my tuition for the Faculty of Science was around $2600. Now the Faculty of Arts charges over $5000 for a full year. And no one can tell me that Arts requires as much upkeep as the Science faculty. Who was responsible for this little mess in Ontario? Mike Harris and the Conservatives who tried to clean up the mess made by Bob Rae and the NDP. So keep it in perspective.

(2) My family's share of the national debt has increased.

Gee, y'think? I will concede a part of this point here because, in reality, the snowballing of the debt did occur during the administration of Trudeau. They made some miscalculations that sent us skyrocketing into greater debt. However, I'm also of the belief that Conservative policies (most notably the North American Free Trade Agreement) have done more to cripple this country and make us subservient to the Americans than anything else. The debt is now at a point where we can't even pay off the interest accruing in the average year, so it really doesn't matter which party is in power, the debtload will increase. However, no one has asked any of us to open up our personal chequebooks to fork over our share. If anyone actually expected a country to pay back its debt, the Americans would be on their knees right now. So really, this is a non-point. Next.

(3) My personal expenses have increased.

So now we're back on this merry-go-round, huh? See my rebuttal for point number one. Inflation. I'm sorry that we can't all live frozen in 1955. Really, I am. But I'm going to go out on a limb and say that the author of this little opus has likely received at least 1 salary performance increase from his job since 1993. If not, then he should look inward on that one and not try and pin the responsibility on the current government.

(4) My waiting time to see a doctor has increased.

I'm guessing our esteemed author has never heard of the North American brain drain phenomenon, eh? The bottomline is that the American's privatized healthcare system is extraordinarily lucrative for physicians. If you had the choice between making $100,000 per year and making $300-500,000 (and these are just arbitrary figures, I have no clue what they really make), then chances are good you're going to go where the money is. That's just reality. If we want to entice our healthcare professionals to stay, then something will have to be done to change our universal healthcare package. This will likely mean that if you have money, then you'll get faster service. Since our dear friend is so hardpressed with his finances already, I believe he will be waiting even longer for service than he was before!

(5) My concerns for my family's safety have increased.

What we have here is a combination of mistrust in a sensationalist media and confusion with provincial jurisdictions. The provinces are responsible for their own law enforcement. And if you feel you're unprotected in your area, it's likely that you've been spending too much time watching your US news affiliates, which are aimed at presenting the most exciting stories (and therefore selling more advertising airtime) than actually airing what's going on in the community. There's a specific formula that the broadcasters use to keep the audience interested. Look into it. It'll be pretty revealing. I live within walking distance of downtown Montreal. I've walked down the infamous "St Catherine" street at well after midnight. No one has even said hello to me, let alone threaten me. Be smart about things and safety won't be an issue.

(6) My costs to educate my children have increased.

Is anyone else here sensing a theme? I've already covered this point pretty thoroughly, but for the sake of fairness, I'll say it again. If tuition costs have gone up, it's because the provincial governments have decided to let this occur. Yes, there is a Federal transfer for education, but the provinces have discretion as to how and where they spend it. Blame your own Conservative government for allowing this to come to pass. They've placed their priorities elsewhere.

(7) Government interference in my life has increased.

Ah yes. How silly of me to have overlooked the Special Projects division of the RCMP and its sister department, CSIS. Its mandate? Make life as inconvenient as possible for this particular author. Their mission since the last election was to aggravate and harass this poor fellow to the point of tears. Grow up.

(8) My personal debt has increased.
(9) My income has stayed more or less the same.
(10) My savings have decreased.

Your personal debt has increased? Try to pay off your credit cards on a monthly basis. Those 18% annual rates will kill you. And, for the record, the only reason that they're THAT low is because of government regulations. Private Label cards have the option of charging as much as 60% per annum.

Your income has stayed more or less the same? Ask for a raise. The government has no control over what your employer decides your job is worth. Or maybe you're just incompetent and not deserving of an increase.

Your savings have decreased? That's because the banks have radically increased the charges for services within their institutions and not raised the interest rates to allow your money to grow. You can't have it both ways, though. Either your mortgage rate stays low and you get paid crap interest, or you let them go hog-wild and you get an extra few pennies per month in your savings account. Suck it up. The government has no impact on any of these areas except at setting the Bank of Canada's lending rate and, guess what! It's been pretty damn low since 9/11.

(11) The buying power of my dollar in Canada has decreased.
Right. Sure, it has. How many different ways can this guy restate the same general problem? Companies have the right, in a capitalist system, to charge what they want for their goods and services. If you've got caviar tastes, but a McDonald's income, you're out of luck, cowboy.

(12) The value of my dollar, in the US, has decreased.
Actually, no. It hasn't. The dollar is worth significantly more now than it was in 1993. Besides, the author claims to be from Edmonton, so somehow I don't think that weekend shopping sprees in Montana are too frequent. Besides, isn't he already tapped out because of his increased debtload and miniscule savings? Next.

(13) My trust in elected officials has decreased.
(14) My trust in the Justice System as decreased.
(15) My hope that a Liberal won't waste my tax dollar has decreased.
(16) My dreams for a better future for my kids, in Canada, have disappeared.

The Federal representatives in Alberta, aside from a few pockets, have been largely Conservative. If he feels he's not being well-represented, then that's really something he should take up with his M.P. Obviously they're not doing their jobs. The other points have just been lumped in for good measure. They're all subjective points, so they can't really be refuted.

There's more to the chain letter, of course, but I'm not going to go any further with my rebuttal for the moment. I think I've made my point pretty clearly as it is. In the end, we're in a semi-democracy, so people will have to make up their own minds. But let's try not to be swayed by some nonsense that someone sends in a SPAM chain letter. Heck, let's try not to be swayed unnecessarily by some guy in Montreal who had a bit of time on his hands, so decided to write this commentary on his Blog! Do your own research and make your own, informed, decision.

A Man's Perspective: Dating Advice for Women

Never sit too close at the ballet, lest you break the illusion. Well, it seems to me that some women really do need to have the magical spell broken so, with that in mind, I'll pull back the curtain to reveal the neurotic little man pulling the strings inside of the heads and libidos of men everywhere. Oh what strange and mysterious creatures we are, we men of the new millennium. Not.

Having endured more than my share of "Why would he do that?" conversations over my lifetime, I decided the time was right to put fingers to keyboard and contribute my 2 cents to the cyber world. So let's tackle the most relevant question: What do guys want? Nothing like taking on the big one right off the bat, eh? I'm going to give it a shot and we'll see if we come up with something profound.

Let's set the stage here: You've just met Mr. Wonderful. He's been saying the right things, making you feel all tingley. What does he want? Sex. It's that simple. He's not concerned with whether you're a delightful conversationalist. He doesn't care about your political views or your heartfelt desire to save the world. He thinks you're pretty cute and wants to get in your panties. Done.

I know there'll be a (perhaps vocal) minority out there who'll try to take the high road and say that sex doesn't enter the equation until there are emotions involved, but seriously, who're they trying to kid? I don't think there's a guy on the planet who'd reject a blowjob from an attractive girl (they may turn it down from an unattractive one, but only if their buddies had seen and/or commented on the girl's nasty appearance beforehand--you'd be surprised at how much more attractive the girl becomes if there's no visual evidence being brought to light, but I digress). So if all guys are wired this way, then how do you determine if Mr. Wonderful is really an asshole in disguise? The answer is equally simple: don't have sex with him on the first date. Or even the second or third. Now I'm not saying that you need to go the route of the 40 Year Old Virgin and wait 20 dates, but by the same token I think there's something to be said for making the guy work for it.

Dating is, very much, like a job interview. And the better the job, the more likely it is that you'll need to pass multiple interviews before you finally land it. So why should dating be any different? Isn't it better to find the right candidate, rather than constantly be training the wrong ones? Ask questions. Get to know him before jumping into bed. See if you have something in common other than that aching to ride the Wild Bundy. You'll be happier with the end results. Dating isn't a race. As long as you cross the finish line with the right person at your side, then everyone wins.

Here's another little hint for the girls in the audience: The Perfect Man does NOT exist. You're not going to find the ultimate combination of looks, intelligence, personality, income and social status. Good looking guys (much like good looking girls) are more likely to be assholes. Why do I say this? It's because they've spent most of their lives getting precisely what they want with a minimal amount of effort. There's a certain amount of self-entitlement that comes with a lifetime of pampering. Why do you think that professional athletes have egos the size of Australia?

Now if you still insist on pursuing one of these Ken dolls, so be it. But how do you tame one of these Golden Boy hunks? Make him work for it. The longer he sticks around, the longer he'll be exposed to your delightful personality and, perhaps, actually be attracted to you for you as opposed to what he's seen through his beer-buzz. Naturally, you're free to do as you please. Just don't come crying to me if you brush off my advice.

updates, updates

So now that everyone's settled into the post-New Year's groove, I figured I should update any of the outstanding stories from our night on the town in Montreal. Let's start with my dear roomie, Megs, and the situation with Martin. I must admit, I was shocked to find that Paul's buddy had somehow worked his way into Meg's bed, but as it turns out, there's more to the story than I would have thought.

Apparently the two of them met up at the pizza place around 3am or so and the two got to talking. They came home, found Paul passed out on the floor (he had fallen off the couch), and then decided to hit the sack. Martin was complaining about having to sleep on the floor again, so Megs offered to let him sleep on her bed, overtop the covers, etc as long as he respected the personal space thing. He agreed, but gradually tried to get closer and closer, playing with her hair a bit and muttering some barely coherent broken phrases in French. So Megs decides that enough is enough and takes off, leaving Martin alone in the room. In fact, she goes off to share the futon mattress with Derek in the other room. Same ground rules applied and Derek was a gentleman about it.

So here's where it starts getting weird. Megs and Derek can hear Martin going back and forth, back and forth before resettling on the floor of Meg's room. Meg decides she'll risk going back to her room because Martin must be trying to make amends at this point. So she goes back to her room and, sure enough, he's curled up on the floor. She gets back into bed to find that IT'S WET!!! Yes, you read that correctly: Martin wet Meg's bed. I guess someone needs to advise that boy to pick up some Depends the next time he decides to get blasted at a bar! Poor Megs. I feel so sorry for her. I have no clue how I would react.

Truth be told, any other events (like my roommate's sister gettin' it on with her boyfriend in our laundry room) pale in comparison, so I'm just going to leave it at that. Happy New Year! Looks like 2006 will be a heck of a year!

Happy New Year!

I'm sitting here, big ol' glass of water within arm's reach, trying to reconstruct the events of last evening. There was alcohol. Oh yes, there was alcohol. And I definitely didn't drink nearly as much as my compatriots, but I'm still feeling a bit rough anyway. It's amazing that such a non-holiday can bring out the most self-destructive behaviour in some people.

Anyway, this was my first New Year's in Montreal and I think we made it a good one. We started off at my apartment, predrinking with my roommates and assorted other people. Meagan is still hell-bent on introducing me to her friend, Kira, but that didn't happen since Kira cancelled. No biggie, as far as I'm concerned. Kira is a single mom who's around my age so she's already got 2 major strikes against her. Though Megs keeps claiming she's not trying to set me up, the alarms are going off left and right in my head. Of course, that could just be the hangover talking. Alrighty, back to the story. So we had a few bevies here before heading off to Belmont Sur le Boulevard, not far from my place. It was $40 open bar from 9pm-midnight. That's just a lawsuit waiting to happen, eh?

Once in the bar, we lost Paul for extended periods of time. Considering the state we eventually found him in, it's apparent he made good use of the open bar. He's going to have a wicked hangover when he wakes up, no doubt. I haven't seen hide nor hair of Martin, but Katie tells me he stayed in Meagan's room. I know Megs eventually came home, so that leads me to wonder what may (or may not) have happened between the two of them. And in keeping with the theme of gettin' your naughty on, my roomie's sister christened our laundry room with her boyfriend once they got back from the bar. So apparently our guests can even manage to get laid in this apartment before I can. I think we all know what my first New Year's resolution will be, eh?

At any rate, I had a good time and no one got arrested or beaten up. Sounds like a success to me!